Lesson learned from a child

I think some of my greatest lessons learned has been through my children.  I have learned an abundance through them.  I have learned much about myself.  They keep me in check!  One morning I was eavesdropping on Sophie in her room, having a “discussion” with one of her baby dolls.  She was speaking what I would consider harshly to her doll and so I knocked on the door and asked her what she was doing.  She said, “I am being the mommy.”  YIKES – that hurt!!

I learned a lesson through Samuel about 6 weeks ago that I have been wanting to share.  It is a lesson I will not forget.

It was a Sunday night and he had a rough night at church.  Two of the girls at church called him names – they laughed at him.  Samuel is intense and he is very aware of what is going on around him.  He was SOOOO grumpy on the way home but we didn’t know why.    He continued with his “defiant” ( really it was a broken spirit ) behavior and so he got a “time- out” in his room.    I went upstairs and found him on his bed.    ( This picture is a posed one – it was not taken during the time I am reflecting on. )

I sat down next to him and tried to put my arm around him.  He would not uncross his arms and he put his chin up in defiance.  I asked him to please talk to me, to tell me what had happened at church, to fill me in on his thoughts and feelings.  He pushed me away and turned his back further towards me.  My tears started falling because I hurt so badly for him.  It hurt that he would not even look at me; that he was angry and that he was choosing to carry this heavy load all alone.   Well, Samuel heard me sniffling and he looked at me and his tears started flowing.  I said, “Samuel, do me a favor – list everything that is so heavy to you right now – tell me why you are this angry.”  About this time, Bob came upstairs and sat down.  Samuel unfolded his arms and he looked us both square in the eyes and he said, ” I am angry because I have only one friend here in Estonia and I don’t see him often;  I miss my friends back at the Christian school;  I miss having a boys Sunday school class;  I miss my Mama and Papa and my uncles;  I am afraid for my uncle who is in Iraq; the girls ( speaking of his sisters ) have each other but I don’t have any brothers to play with; I am lonely.”   Well, by this time he was no longer defiant but broken in my arms.  I cried with him and Bob and I talked to him.   I could see the weight being lifted from him as he communicated with us; as he was honest in his thoughts and feelings.  We prayed with him and all was well with our little boy.  Bob carried him downstairs on his back and they enjoyed the rest of the evening watching football and eating peanuts and chips and dip.

But, I stayed on Samuel’s bed for a long time.  My tears were still falling as I realized that there are times that I act just like Samuel with my Heavenly Father.   I admit that there have been times when I have crossed my arms in defiance; I have clenched my fists; I have been stubborn; I have pushed Him away all the while wondering why He doesn’t take care of me.   God has tried to comfort me through His word and I turn my back further away from Him.  He puts His arms around me and I push Him away.    I say, “God I am all alone!” – and yet He is RIGHT there beside me!  As I hurt for my child when he is hurting, God hurts for me when I am hurting – only His love is magnified.    This particular Sunday evening was such a profound experience for me and one that I will not forget.  It has shaped me.

Lets do right by our children!  Let them see Him through us!    Blessings to you and yours this evening, I pray!